Dad's memorial service is tomorrow. Feeling like my heart is dragging, being pulled toward an experience I'd just rather not have to go through. But at the same time I am looking forward to hearing from people who loved him, people I don't even know, like his patients. From what I've heard so far, he was dearly loved, enjoyed, and appreciated. Of course I knew that, but it's so good to hear it right from the sources.
I'm also looking forward to our remembrance tables with photos and memorabilia that show a glimpse of who Dad is. Sad, though, that many photos just could not be found. Slices of his life will be missing from the displays - important slices like of my childhood years before the divorce, and of his life with his wife of 16 years who is now facing life without him. We just can't find or get to these photos. We have mostly early photos from before I was born and then recent photos from the last 10 years. I do feel badly for his wife, she will be little represented and that's just not right. I've had to let go of the sadness over these disappointments. We've done the best we can and it will be very nice as it is.
One really wonderful thing, though, is that we found his old medical bag, "Dad's Black Bag", as we called it when I was little. It still had medical supplies in it, some of which we left in. We found some Navy stuff, too, that will be great.
I'll post again after things settle down for me. I'm sure when I get back home to the quiet woods it will be there that I start to melt down. Been holding it all at bay for the last week. Gosh...it's been a week today since he passed. Guess I'm glad I didn't notice at 1:00 p.m. today.
Until later...
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